What Future Are You Standing For?

Runtime: ~12 minutes 

In this episode, Frances shares a reflection sparked by a question: What future are you standing for? From shifting ambitions in midlife to collective dreams rooted in compassion, this episode invites you to pause, reflect, and imagine again. 

With three guiding anchors and a grounding practice, Frances helps you explore how to align your evolving self with an evolving dream, not just for your own life, but for the world we’re all part of. 

 Timestamps:

00:00 – Opening & welcome

01:20 – The spiral of returning: changing dreams in midlife

04:30 – Anchor 1: Let Your Evolving Self Shape an Evolving Dream (Crystalline Power)

07:10 – Anchor 2: Root Your Dream in Purpose and Live It as a Practice (Intention & Embodiment)

09:30 – Anchor 3: Let Your Dream Be Big Enough to Include Others (Collective Vision & Hope)

11:30 – Practice: Intention-Setting – What Future Are You Standing For?

13:45 – Closing reflection & invitation to share 

Guiding Anchors from this Episode:

1. Let Your Evolving Self Shape an Evolving Dream Tap into your crystallized intelligence or insight shaped by life experience and create from the values that matter most now. 

2. Root Your Dream in Purpose and Live It as a Practice Set intentions that rise from love and clarity, not pressure or fear. Let them take form in the way you move through the world. 

3. Let Your Dream Be Big Enough to Include Others The most powerful dreams are collective. Imagine futures not only for yourself, but for your communities and the world. 

Mentioned 

• Arthur Brooks – From Strength to Strength 

• Dr. James Doty – Into the Magic Shop, Mind Magic 

• Concepts: Crystallized intelligence, intention-setting, manifestation grounded in neuroscience 

Connect With Frances:

• Website: www.flourishingmindsco.com
• Substack: franceslacuesta.substack.com
• Instagram: @flourishingmindsco

Transcript

Frances Lacuesta: 0:00

Hello friends, this is Notes from the Tenderverse. I'm Frances Lacuesta and I'm your host. Thank you for being here. This is a space where we explore life with humanity, wonder and grace. If this is your first time here, welcome. I'm so glad we found each other. Today's reflection begins with a question. What future are you standing for? There's a season for everything. A season for healing, a season for being in solitude, a season for rest. And if your soul is nudging you, a season for dreaming. And for me, this feels like that kind of season. Recently, I opened up to my partner about something I had been feeling. One night when we were chatting, I told him, You know, I don't feel as ambitious as I used to. I missed having a dream that's so big it feels impossible. One that excites me. Because I know myself. From my teens to my 30s, I was ambitious and competitive. I was always in the lookout for opportunities to advance in my career and in life. There was always something to accomplish, something to achieve. But in my 40s, I noticed I started to slow down a bit. I wasn't as competitive. I still have big dreams, of course, but not all of them feel alive anymore. My priorities have definitely changed and so has my outlook in life. I'm not chasing the same things I once did, which is a lucrative job, a big house. Tons of money in the bank or a fancy car. Don't get me wrong, those dreams aren't wrong. They're worthy if that's what lights you up. But for me, they just don't spark the same fire like they did in the past. The dream I love for now is the kind that feels alive. one I can feel in my gut or the soles of my feet and one that brings goosebumps to my skin. And being around younger people, ones who are hopeful and hungry, has reawakened something in me. And it challenges me to dream again. So, with the question in mind, what future am I standing for? I want to invite you to dream with me. And in doing so, I want to offer you three guiding anchors that may help you craft your own. The first one is let your evolving self shape an evolving dream, or I call this the crystalline power. Dreams don't disappear, they transform. At 25, I was fresh out of college and ready to take on the world. I chased what society told me mattered. Status, money, material success. In my late 30s and now 40s, I've started to root. I started looking inward. I prioritized relationships. And I've been building qualities like compassion, gratitude, kindness. These are more important to me now. And because of grief, heartaches, and disappointments, I learned a lot more about myself, so my dreams have also evolved. Psychologists talk about two kinds of intelligence we all carry, the fluid and crystallized intelligence. These ideas were introduced by British psychologist Raymond Cattell and made more apparent accessible by Arthur Brooks in his book From Strength to Strength. And here's the difference between the two. Fluid intelligence is what we rely on in our younger years, meaning it's about quick thinking, it's about problem solving, it's about learning fast. Think of it as speed and being sharp. Whereas crystallized intelligence develops much later in life, usually in our 40s and beyond. because it's built from our lived experiences. It's about inside emotional maturity and perspective. So think of it as depth and wisdom. So while fluid intelligence may decline as you age, crystallized intelligence rises and becomes more valuable. Because this allows us to be in touch with compassion, it allows us to lead with clarity and dream with more purpose. Arthur Brooks calls this shift from resume virtues, which is more about status, titles, accomplishments, to eulogy virtues, which speaks about who we were, how we loved, and what we stood for. So in this season of life, I invite you, to create from your crystallized intelligence. Ask yourself, what matters most to me now? What do I want to help build in this world? This isn't a step back. It's about turning inward because it's where deeper dreams live. So tap into that wisdom. The second is, root your dream in purpose and live it as a practice. This is more about intention and embodiment. So manifestation is a word that's tossed around a lot and that has probably lost its meaning. But real manifestation isn't about crossing your fingers and hope for the best or not doing anything. And neither is it about magical thinking. It's about anchoring your intention in your brain and in your body so your entire being quietly moves in the direction of what matters most for you. Dr. James Doty, Stanford neurosurgeon and author of Mind Magic and Into the Magic Shop, explains that manifestation works when you deeply feel Visualize and repeat your intention even when results aren't immediate. When you do that, your brain begins to form new neural pathways that align your subconscious with your dream. But there is something more. It's the quality behind your intention that also matters. So Doty's research shows that When your intention is rooted in compassion and kindness and service, it activates your parasympathetic nervous system, which is responsible for your rest and digest mode. And this is also responsible for a state of calm, clarity, and creativity. But when it's focused only on achievement or status or something that is external, your brain can slip into anxiety. your fight or flight mode, and you can experience stress because there is a lot of pushing and striving there. So here's a gentle reframe. A dream starts as a longing or a vision, whereas an intention is when you give that dream shape and direction, and then you practice it. And so ask yourself, What dream is asking to become an intention in my life? And what future feels so meaningful for me? Let your intention rise from a place of love and not of fear. The third one is let your dream be big enough to include others. And this is about collective vision and hope. For me, this is the heart of it. Dreaming isn't just personal. It's essential for the collective. In a world that's full of grief, disconnection, and uncertainty, we need more people imagining and dreaming for better futures. And not just for themselves, not just for ourselves, but for all of us. These are futures of social justice, of healing, a future where women rise, children are protected, and compassion shapes communities. What would change if more of us stood up for futures we may never see, but believe in deeply? When you dream for the collective, you become a vessel for hope. And right now, the world needs hope. Before I share a practice, here's a recap of the three guiding anchors. Number one, let your evolving self shape an evolving dream. This is about crystalline power. Second is root your dream and purpose and live it as a practice. This is about intention and embodiment. Third, let your dream be big enough to include others. This is about collective vision and hope. If this stirred something in you, I invite you to pause and plant a seed. Ask yourself, what future am I willing to stand for? Not just wish for, but commit to in small, sacred ways. And if you have time, set aside A quiet space where you can light a candle and pray if that's something you do. And write whatever comes up in your journal. And after reflecting, try writing a one-line intention or a quiet declaration to return to. Something like, I stand for a future. where no child goes hungry. Or I stand for a future where people feel safe by being fully themselves. Or I stand for a future where we care for the earth, for those who come after us. And feel it in your body and let it land. Let this be your compass. What future are you standing for? Let this be your season to imagine again, to hold a dream close, not just for yourself, but for the world you love. If this reflection stirred something in you, I'd love to hear from you. If you'd like to share your story or send me a message, you can find how to reach me in the show notes. Just scroll down wherever you're listening. And if this episode spoke to you, I'd be so grateful if you shared it with a friend or someone who might need it too. To end, I want to leave you with this message. If today you're feeling powerless, remember, your dreams matter. You matter. Until next time, bye for now.