How to Fall In Love With Life

In a world filled with noise, negativity, and constant overwhelm, how do we make space for joy, wonder, and the quiet goodness still around us?

In this episode, I explore the deeply human experience of forgetting and remembering the beauty of being alive. From our innate negativity bias to the transformative power of awe, we reflect on how to stay open-hearted even when the world feels heavy.

If you’ve been feeling disconnected or dulled by life’s demands, this is an invitation to return to what matters.

In this episode, you’ll hear:

• Why our brains are wired to notice what’s wrong and how to shift toward what’s right
• How nature can help rekindle creativity, calm, and connection
• What aesthetic chills are and how awe can expand your sense of the sacred
• Why celebrating small daily victories can actually build resilience
• a lovingkindness practice to stay inspired and soften your view of others (and yourself).

📩 Let’s Connect

What’s one small thing you’re celebrating today?

I'd love to hear from you. Connect with me via the links below.

And if this episode offered you something meaningful, consider forwarding it to a friend who might need a lift today.

Connect With Frances:

• Website: www.flourishingmindsco.com
• Substack: franceslacuesta.substack.com
• Instagram: @flourishingmindsco

Transcript

Hello friends. 

Welcome to notes from the tender verse. I'm Frances Lacuesta, and I'm so grateful you're here. If this is your first time tuning in. Thank you for being curious. This space is a gentle corner of the world where we reflect on what it means to live with grace, humanity and presence. 

Lately, I've been thinking about how easy it is to lose sight of joy, especially in the world we're living in now. As humans, we tend to lean toward the negative, and this is called the negativity bias. 

We often remember what went wrong, what hurt, what didn't work out, and with the news feeding us mostly grim updates, it's easy to slip into that mindset. I catch myself sometimes saying things that lean toward the negative, or I find myself nodding in agreement when someone brings up how bad or gloomy things are, but truthfully, not everything is doom and gloom. 

We forget sometimes that this world is also filled with so much good, and there are so many moments, encounters and wonders that remind us life can be messy, but it can also be beautiful. So in this episode, I want to share a few gentle anchors that helped me stay rooted in that truth, that despite the darkness, there is light, and despite all that's uncertain, there's still wonder. 

Here are a few ways to fall deeply, madly in love with life. Again, the first is, nature is a haven for inspiration. Someone asked me recently where I get the ideas I share on this podcast, and the answer is, everywhere. Ideas come while I'm falling asleep in the shower, while cooking, having conversations, watching movies, listening to music, reading or walking. But when I feel stuck or uninspired, I always return to nature. I'm fortunate to live near the ocean and get to witness the sunrise almost every day. I wake up early just to catch it, and sometimes with a small community who gathers at the beach to move and stretch together at 630 in the morning, sometimes I walk, but before that, I sit and watch the sky light up as the sun slowly and gloriously greets the day. I say my prayers, I give thanks and I feel nourished. It fills my heart to feel grateful simply for being alive and being able to witness this. 

There's actually growing evidence that being in nature can ease anxiety, mental fatigue and stress. So if you need a boost in creativity, or if you feel mentally blocked, it can help to pause and intentionally step outside, even for just a few minutes. If you have access to it, go to a nearby park or walk barefoot on a grass, sit under a tree, or just listen to the rustling of leaves or children playing softly on the background if you're near a playground, or the lapping of the waves if you are near the ocean, watch The sunrise or sunset. Feel the wind on your skin, notice the rhythm of your breath matching the sound of ocean waves, or pause to really take in the birdsong around you. And even if you don't live near wide open spaces, there are still ways to connect. 

Seek out pockets of green where you can whether it's a small community garden, a quiet bench beneath a single tree, or even tending to your own house plants or balcony garden, sometimes just opening a window to watch the clouds move you. Bring a surprising sense of grounding. 

Nature has a way of reminding us that we're part of something greater, and that beauty is never far if we choose to notice it. 

Second, invite awe and wonder into your life, some of the most profound, transcendental moments we can experience come through beauty, those chills, inducing encounters with art, story, music, film, poetry, nature, travel, or even a powerful speech, these are doorways into awe and wonder. They bypass logic and speak directly to the soul we feel before we even think. And this sensation is called esthetic chills, or frisson, which is a French word meaning shiver. It's that wave of goose bombs or tingling on the skin often described as a shiver down the spine or at the nape of the neck. 

Scientifically aesthetic chills are linked to heightened emotional and neural activity, especially in areas tied to reward, memory, and meaning-making. Researchers have found that dopamine, or the feel-good neurotransmitter, often spikes in those moments. They're not just fleeting feelings, they are embodied signs of resonance, connection, and transcendence. I experienced this vividly in Cordoba in Spain, when I stepped inside the mosque cathedral. 

From the outside, it was already magnificent, but once I entered, I was unprepared for how breathtaking it was, rows and rows of red and white arches, and these are called the arches of infinity, and they stretched endlessly. It was once a mosque and later transformed into a cathedral, and every detail was intentional. 

The builders believed that by creating beauty, they were drawing closer to the divine. And as I stood there transfixed, a shiver moved up my spine and gratitude flooded my chest, I felt awe, and that was aesthetic chills in action. My body was responding to the sacredness of the moment. And this reminded me of a passage from The Color Purple by Alice Walker. If you have the chance to read this book, please do. And here is the quote from the book. 

"I believe God is everything, everything that is, or ever was or ever will be. And when you feel that, and be happy to feel that you found it God love everything you love and a mess of stuff you don't, but more than anything else, God loves admiration. I think it pisses God off. If you walk by the color purple in a field somewhere and don't notice it, people think pleasing God is all God care about. But any fool living in the world can see it always trying to please us." End quote.

I just love that passage, and I keep going back to it, because it reminds me to notice the beauty around us, even when it feels like the world is heavy with sorrow, and all of it can be seen as God Spirit or the universe. Way of saying, look at all these beautiful things. These are for you. 

You can intentionally create more awe-inspiring moments in your life by listening to stirring music, watching a powerful film, sitting with a poem, getting lost in a painting, or hearing someone speak truth from the heart. 

The third, celebrate the little moments. This is, in many ways, a gratitude practice. We tend to reserve celebration for the big milestones, weddings, babies, graduations, birthdays. But what about the smaller everyday wins, the ones that quietly make up the fabric of our lives? I came across an article in The New York Times about this. And it stayed with me how noticing and honoring these micro occasions can actually build resilience and help us feel more grounded. They remind us that joy doesn't only live in the extraordinary. It's tucked into the ordinary as well. 

Think about it.

Waking up early to catch the sunrise. That's something to celebrate. Finally brewing that perfect cup of coffee in the morning, renewing your passport after months of putting it off, showing off for a dentist's appointment. You've been avoiding finishing a chapter of the book you keep meaning to read, folding the laundry that's been sitting on the chair for days, and choosing to rest when your body asks for it, or clearing five stubborn emails from your inbox. 

Yes, they may seem small, but they are worth honoring. Each one is a little act of care, of showing up, of tending to life. Celebrating these micro wins isn't just feel-good fluff. There's neuroscience behind it. Every time you pause to acknowledge a small victory, your brain's reward system lights up, releasing dopamine, or the feel-good chemical that boosts motivation and confidence, and if you invite others into these micro celebrations, friend, partner, or even your journal, you also inspire them to start noticing their own little wins, too. 

So here's an invitation. 

What's one small thing you want to celebrate today? I actually would love to hear that, so feel free to message me, and you can see the details from the show notes. 

The fourth, see the goodness in others. This one is simple, but not always easy, especially when we are feeling overwhelmed or cynical or exhausted by what's going on in the world now, but underneath all the noise, most people are trying their best with what they know, what they've been given in the wounds they carry, to see the goodness in others is not to Ignore harm or bypass accountability. 

It's to remain open-hearted in a world that often rewards defensiveness and distrust. I admit this is where I struggle the most, especially in times of divided opinions and growing polarity. It's so easy to pass judgment on others and want to be right; it's a continual learning process for me, and I often have to pause, especially when I notice the righteous part of me starts to bubble up. Does this sound familiar?

And here are a few things that help me. One is to look for micro kindness. It could be the stranger who held the door for you, the driver who let you merge in traffic, the friend who texted just to check in. These little gestures are easy to miss if we don't pay attention. Two, be curious instead of assuming the worst. In another, ask yourself, what might this person be going through? If I were in this person's shoes, what would I do? What would I feel? Would I act the same way, empathy plays a strong role in this and can help soften the edge. Third, recall a time when someone surprised you, when your assumptions about someone turned out to be wrong in the best way, these stories remind us to leave space for grace and prove that we're not always right, and maybe most importantly, extend that same practice to yourself.

See the goodness within you, because the way we treat others often mirrors how we relate to ourselves. 

So there you have it, four ways to fall in love with life again, to recap. The first is let nature inspire you. Second is to invite awe and wonder. Third is to celebrate small wins and four. Is to let goodness in others and in yourself be what you choose to see. 

And before I close, I would like to invite you to a short loving kindness practice, so just allowing your body to settle, and if you are in a safe space to do so, to close your eyes or cast them down, if that's what you prefer, if you prefer to sit or to lie down, sit on the floor, on the mat, it's totally up to you, and this time, just following the breath and allowing your body to settle and to feel grounded, Using your breath as an anchor.

And if you'd like, bring your hand to your chest or to your heart area and say these verses, or you can make up your own. May I be happy, may I be safe, may I be healthy, may I be free from harm, may I be at peace. May I love and may I be loved. You can repeat this several times if you wish, and in doing so, notice what's going on in your body. What are you feeling? 

You can also extend this to someone you really care about, and you can say and send loving kindness to that person or even your pet. You also can extend it to someone who is neutral, perhaps the person you see on the street every morning that you don't talk to as much. Or you can extend it to an acquaintance in your office, school, in a community that you are not really familiar with, to somebody who is neutral. 

You may also extend it to someone you are not in agreement with to someone whom you have a bit of an animosity with. And this one can be challenging, yes, but notice, notice what it feels like in your body when you wish that person loving kindness and lastly, you may extend it to to everyone around you, to your community, to the Earth, to the flora and fauna, just wishing loving kindness to everyone and noticing how that feels, extend that love, that gratitude, that feeling that is outside of you.

And whenever you're ready, opening your eyes and just taking it in and taking a deep breath and just breathing out gratitude. Thank you for being here and for for joining me in this space. I'd love to hear what's been helping you stay inspired these days, you'll find ways to connect with me in the show notes. And if this episode moved you, consider sharing it with someone who might need a little lift today. Until next time, everyone. Thank you. Bye for now.